I’ve got ten minutes before I have to clock in for work, but I’ve decided to take those ten minutes and start on this post which I will likely continue to write during my break and after work, so excuse me if I cut out every now and then.
Lots of things have happened since I last spoke with you guys! Biggest of them all I’ve already teased in the above paragraph. I work at Starbucks now! It’s a really fun job even though it can be really stressful as well. I’m in training right now and my trainer is the absolute best. She’s as big of a Harry Potter fan as I am and she is really patient and funny. She also knows my best friend from their Summer job at the pool, so that’s a plus. I’m really lucky to be under her care.
I really hope they don’t put me on drive-thru today. It’s probably the most stressful part of the job and I’m still not very fast on the register. I really wish I didn’t work at a Starbucks with a drive-thru. I think a drive-thru sort of defeats the purpose of a coffee shop, which is so built around community and making connections with the people around you. It’s hard to get that over a speaker. However, we try really hard to bring it there anyway, which is good.
The benefits are absolutely to die for! While I can’t use some of the big ones yet such as health, dental and vision, they can help me pay for my tuition down the road and I get a free pound of coffee or box of tea every week, which is brilliant. I also get free drinks on the job, which is great as long as I don’t drink a bunch of caffeine because it does things to my stomach.
On my break now. My poor boss hit her knee super hard on a shelf that was sticking out from the wall. I had to run around trying to find a thing to put ice in and get back to her. She hit right on her funny bone and broke the skin. Needless to say, she’s not having a very good day.
They had me working on the drive-thru today but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Last time I had an anxiety attack, but today I was running around doing a few different jobs, none of them actually talking with the customer, so it was a lot easier. In fact, it was a lot of fun!
So back to updating you on what has been going on lately. I’m taking a Intro to Psychology class at Metro right now and my professor is the absolute worse. She doesn’t really teach us as much as summarize what we’ve already read in the textbook and there’s a quiz every single week which she requires us to have our own scantron sheets for. This wouldn’t bother me so much if it she was a good teacher. I’ve been having to rely on Crash Course Psychology to pass my class. Hank Green, bless him, should not be a better teacher than my professor who has a Doctorate in the field. Ugh.
Finally off work. I actually got to talk to drive-thru customers over the headset, which went well but was still very nerve-racking. I’m getting to be better friends with my coworkers. Two of them, including my trainer, are as nerdy as I am. There’s a joke here that we go through managers quicker than Hogwarts goes through Defense Against the Dark Arts professors, which made me laugh really hard. I can’t imagine why we go through them so quickly. Everyone seems really nice and it doesn’t seem like there’s a lot of drama. I guess I’ll figure that out as I go.
I’m almost done with my training which is more worrisome than exciting. I don’t know how ready I am to do all this on my own. I’m still pretty shaky on the register and I don’t know all the beverages. My trainer says to give myself three months before I really get it. The idea of being this shaky for three months scares me. I guess I’ll get the hang of it though, and everyone here is pretty patient, so I just need to calm down and keep my head up. My trainer, who knows I cosplay, told me to “cosplay as a barista!” whenever I’m nervous. This helps a lot. When I cosplay, I’m playing a different role. I’m confident, ready to jump at a moment’s notice. I’m strong. So I’m trying to keep that in my head. I’m cosplaying as a barista. I’m cosplaying as a successful college student. I’m cosplaying as someone without anxiety.
Next week they want me to come in at 4:30 AM. Ugh! My trainer said she could give me a ride since we live close to each other, which I think I’ll take her up on because I’ve been asking a lot of my mom lately and she shouldn’t have to wake up that early. I really need to get my license. It wouldn’t help all that much because we still don’t have a car for me to drive and mom uses hers every single day, but if I had it, I might be able to go out with my friends and stay out as long as I want or drive myself to Quidditch. It’s just difficult for me to get behind the wheel, primarily because every time I do, I think about my Dad and how he was supposed to teach me how to drive.
I keep on imagining that he’s actually alive and that one day I’m going to bump into him. I don’t know whether this my desperate attempt to keep him from being dead or just denial. It’s probably both. I know he’s dead. I wear his ashes around my neck every day, but I never saw the body and my mind just can’t help but wonder. Sherlock definitely does not help this fantasy I have. Sometimes I get mad at John Watson because it’s not fair he got his best friend back, but my father will remain dead. Maybe that’s why I keep imagining my Dad driving up to the window at work, or walking across the pitch at Quidditch, or why I can’t look at an old man without thinking maybe it’s him. I’m determined to have my Empty Hearse.
On a lighter note, I’m working on two new cosplays right now. The first, Cecil Palmer from Welcome to Night Vale, is nearly done. I just need to order his patch from online, get his vest and style his wig. The second is Sherlock Holmes from the BBC Sherlock TV series. His is practically nonexistent right now and is definitely one of my most expensive pieces to date. I need to order the coat and scarf from Amazon and then the wig from Arda which is currently out of stock. Everything else is actually the same for my Cecil cosplay, so that’s nice. I’ll be wearing both of these at Starfest and Denver Comic Con, so if you’re going to either of those and see me, feel free to say hi!
I think that’s it for now. I should go actually study. I’ll be uploading pictures of my cosplay as I finish them, so look out for that.